So I have decided I need to 'introduce' you to my children. Writing my 'whatever-year-old' is getting boring, so I have given them each a fitting nick name. I think it is important to maintain their privacy by withholding their actual names. I don't want a blog post I wrote about pants-pooping to pop up when my kids' prospective employers google them someday!
Iron-willed Politician with Teen Angst: This is my nearly sixteen-year-old son. I guess God was concerned that I may get too full of myself as a mom, so he gave me Politician. His preschool teachers said he would be a lawyer when he grew up, and he has been dubbed 'Governor' at 4-H events. Most people think he is awesome, and I do too, but to say he has been challenging to raise would be an understatement. I won't write too much about him as a teen until I find out if he manages to live up to his great potential in a few years, and also because if he ever happens to find and read my blog, I know he will dissect it until he can find a way to use it as proof that I don't like him. Of course, he is wrong. While he is completely exasperating, he has some amazing qualities that I would not give up in exchange for more peace. I think it is all a package deal!
The Perfectionist: This is my fourteen-year-old daughter. If it weren't for that darn regular A in art, she would have straight A+'s and it really irritates her. She has lots of friends and is a starter on her basketball team. She would have fit the oldest child role perfectly. She was born with some type-A genes from my side of the family that are dormant in my DNA. Just her being her, makes Politician completely crazy so Politician makes her completely crazy, on purpose.
Overly-Dramatic Hoarder: This is my eleven-year-old daughter. Last summer, I loaded the contents of her room into four large totes, and yet, I cannot see any of her bedroom floor right now. It is everyone else's fault, just ask her. But do not dare ask her to pick up anything, ever, unless you enjoy foot-stomping, eye-rolling, bawling, and an occasional, "Why do you hate me?" Apparently, in a family of seven, middle-child syndrome crops up in number three. She is an amazing mathematician, so I have high hopes that her rational mind will triumph over this emotionalism some day!
Stealth Ninja: This is my eight-year-old son. He is the most naturally empathetic and tender-hearted of my children. If I counted all the words the rest of my kids said together and compared it to the number of words he said, the ratio would be about 5 million to 1. He recently told me he 'h-a-t-e-s h-o-m-e-w-i-r-k'. Needless to say, he could use to do a little more of it, if I could ever find him. He has missed out on dinner because he was hiding from me. He also suffers from encopresis.
Know-it-all Sassy-pants: This is my six-year-old daughter. She is smart and cute and she will tell you about it. Here is my favorite story about her that sums up her personality perfectly. When she was four, Ninja told her the ribbon she got at fair was just for 'parpissapation." Her response? "I think you mean parTIcipation and I am telling mom that you said piss."
Lovey Maniac: This is my three-year-old son. He loves to snuggle up and whisper, "You my lovey mama," in my ear during the brief moments when he isn't jumping on the couch, jumping off the stools, running into the wall, peeing his pants, dumping out five puzzles, lining up trucks across the living room, or creating a huge mess in the kitchen because he wants to make his food and drinks, "I-self."
Pretty, Pretty Princess: She's the baby and a really sweet, lazy baby. No further explanation is needed.
Oh, and Hubby, I can't forget him! The love of my life!
So here is my first so-sooo stinkin' it up as a mom post! When I started blogging, I told myself that I would be careful not to get so preoccupied with it that I got worse at the things I already do poorly, such as remembering appointments. But then again, I tell myself I am going to do a lot of things I don't actually do. My trouble started when I forgot to take my 14-year- old to the orthodontist. This is one of those moments when I get a reality check that I am doing some just plain sub-par mothering rather than being so-so. While it isn't the end of the world, (it just means braces for an extra 6 weeks of my daughter's life), it is still enough for me to realize I need to try a bit harder. As long as she is not still wearing them to her junior prom, I refuse to feel guilty.
Starting my blog has definitely taken up some of my already limited brain space. I have always thought brain cells are excreted in breast milk, so I am getting seriously depleted by now. I wouldn't even have ventured into blogging had I not discovered the Cozi calendar app and downloaded it on my phone to replace the part of my brain that remembers where to be and when to be there. The phone really dropped the ball on the orthodontist appointment. Just kidding. Actually, I entered that appointment before I figured out that I had to include myself on the checklist for the reminder to show up. After the missed orthodontist appointment, there was a kid with no pants, a last-minute 8 layer cake, and a Valentine's cards fiasco, but those are posts all in themselves, so I will spare you for now.
My final shred of scheduling sanity departed when I left in the third quarter of a nail-biter of a junior high basketball game to get to an already in progress FFA (Future Farmer's of America) event. The school recently implemented a genius (yes, sarcasm) policy to lock all the doors to all the schools. They sent out a lovely e-mail that sounded more like it was being sent by a prison than a school. The e-mail should have simply read: "Late people should just quit coming to things - you won't be able to get in!" There is just something about my child being inside a building that I am locked out of that infuriates me beyond all reason! I guess it is a good way to break in the moms whose children grow up to become incarcerated felons, but I am hoping not to be one of those. By the way, I do hear the collective sigh of all the homeschooling moms out there. I wish I could be you today and I am glad I can provide some validation for your choice. But I digress. As I stood there kicking the ever-loving crap out of the door, partly in hopes of getting in, but mostly to take out my frustrations, I realized... No, I realized nothing then, I was just really mad and hoping the guy who came and opened the door didn't think I was a complete lunatic. This morning I realized that, though the locked doors make me super angry, I was also feeling overwhelmed by an excessively full schedule.
So what is a family of nine (or even 5 or 6) to do? Step one: Accept being busy. You will have plenty of evenings at home in another decade. I have to keep telling myself this about every day lately. Step two: Get Cozi. Hearing about this app a few months ago was literally the only reason I finally broke down and bought a smart phone and I have not been disappointed! My favorite part is that every family member can be selected individually and reminders will be sent to exactly the right people. For example, I included my husband on the Christmas program event and when I forgot to remind him it was coming up, Cozi did it for me. The wild events of the last few days have given me some ideas to utilize Cozi even more effectively. From now on, when a kid tells me about a school report or project coming up in three weeks that requires a multi-hour baking project, I will put that in Cozi. I am also trying to stop lying to myself about how I am going to remember anything, ever. I am not. Put it in Cozi!
DIsclaimer: I became a Cozi affiliate while writing this post, so I may be compensated, but I assure you my love for it is real!
Children's stories often have an underlying educational message. There are books about being kind, sharing, doing your best, and forgiving others. These are all great character qualities that you want to instill in your children. But what if you could teach your child about concepts larger than themselves outside their own little bubble of existence?
Now, you can! The Tuttle Twins series by Connor Boyack does just that. He takes complicated issues about freedom, rights, and government, some based on difficult to read books for adults, like Bastiat and Hayek, and condenses them into easy-to-understand children's books.
If you are strong believer in the Constitution, individual rights, and limited government, but have never heard of Bastiat and Hayek then you really need these books. Imagine trying to pass on your religious beliefs without all the Christian books you read to your children. Now you can pass on an understanding freedom to them as well.
Each year, hundreds of millions of children are spoon-fed false history, bad economics, and logical fallacies. Your child is not immune.
I have only read the first two books in the series so far, but I am excited to get them as Christmas gifts for my kids. There is a great discount for ordering the entire set at once and the purchases comes with some great free bonuses. Be sure to use the coupon code FREEDOM at checkout for an even better value. Another wonderful opportunity offered by the author is to purchase afundraiser pack. Five copies of each book is sent to you (with free shipping using coupon code USPS) at a discounted book rate, so your organization can sell the books at regular price and earn the difference of four dollars per book sold.
I am the mother of seven children ranging from teens to a toddler, living out in the middle of nowhere, USA. I aim to hone the craft of giving advice without pretending to have this whole mom thing figured out. I am Christian, but not the really nice kind that is good at it. I am also conservative, but I promise not to be in your face with political agendas very often. I like to infuse humor into my writing, so don't freak out if you are offended or appalled by what you read here. There is a very fine line between serious advice and sarcastic hyperbole.